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I’ve been here over a week now, but it wasn’t until Saturday when I got off the train from Southampton and walked over to the Thames that I suddenly realised… “Oh my God… I’m in f**ing LONDON… what the hell am I doing here, on the other side of the world???”.
It’s been a big few weeks, and I do apologise for not having written about my encounters earlier, but it’s just been crazy! I’ll start from the beginning and break it up into sections for my lazier readers…
Mardi Gras
I was actually meant to fly out on Saturday 1st, but much to the dismay of my boss there was no way in hell I was going to miss Mardi Gras… after all, it’s Gay Christmasâ„¢! What a night it was too… starting off at Drew and Lee’s place (complete with half-naked Brazilian waiters), we watched the parade from his roof and enjoyed many a fine beverage. Of course, this was only just starters… the real night was to come. Sydney really comes alive at Mardi Gras… the atmosphere was brilliant. The party, comprising of some 25,000 half-naked beautiful men, was positively surreal. I danced my little butt off, spent time with many of my good friends, and traipsed home in the rain with some very friendly randoms.
The Flight Over
Unfortunately I didn’t get much sleep… I was woken up after just 3 hours sleep by Qantas, telling me my flight had been delayed by four hours, and wouldn’t leave until 9pm! Arrrghh! I really had to be at work by 9am UK time, so I desperately tried to get another flight. All booked out. So I quickly packed my stuff, went to the airport, gave my boy a big good-bye smooch, and applied for standby with about 5 airlines. Wouldn’t you believe it… not one available seat! So I sat at the airport for 7 hours… absolutely ghastly!
The flight itself was uneventful… I was in cattle class (drat and curses to the new company travel policy!), cooped up beside the window with a pillow and my iPod. I managed to stay awake until Bangkok, get a litre of Johnny Black and a carton of cigarettes for 1500 Baht (about $45 AUD, freshers), and get back on the yet-again-delayed plane off to London. I managed to get some broken sleep, but those seats really aren’t designed for sleeping!
Thankfully when I got to London, a driver was waiting for me and was kind enough to let me have a much longed-after cigarette before heading off to Southampton. Miraculously enough, I got there at 11am, only 90 minutes late for the start of the training course.
Southampton
The first thing that hit me was the cold… and boy they weren’t wrong! It’s not so much the temperature, but the wind that cuts right to the bone. Southampton is a nice place, but it’s not really a happening area. On Thursday night a couple of the young blokes from our UK office went out for a few drinks at the Walkabout Hotel (yes, an Aussie-themed pub), and I ordered a bottle of Toohey’s Extra Dry. By God… it was WARM !!! I know that the Brits are renowned for warm beer, but in an Aussie pub, with an Aussie beer??? Sacrilegious! We then went out to a spot called Bedford Place, which is the “night spot” of Southampton, and full of students. Going to a place called “Vodka Revolutions”, I proceeded to get extremely inebriated as so many of my workmates kept putting drink after drink in front of me, testing their theory that “Aussies can drink”. I held my own… but only just! Thankfully staggering home was possible.
London
The real jewel in my trip abroad was my weekend in London. Although fairly expensive, the train trip into London was fast and clean… I arrived at Waterloo without any problems and walked out of the station to come face-to-face with The London Eye, just over the river from Westminster and Big Ben. I had a look around there, and then caught the Tube to Tower Bridge. Even though I was doing touristy things, I made every attempt not to look like one, only getting the camera out when it was really worth it. Tourists just look stupid and are easy targets for the “undesirables”.
It was then time to go off via the Tube to the Camden Markets, where I didn’t know what I was looking for, but seemed to find anything and everything for sale anyway. Managed to pick up some leather gloves and a new leather jacket… considering the weather, it was a very sensible choice! Found a little present from Adam from a cute Romanian struggling artist, and then decided to head off to Trafalgar Square. It was by this time I had been walking a lot… I was absolutely exhausted! So I waltzed into the National Gallery, plonked myself in front of a Monet, and just relaxed for a bit.
Soho
The real event I went to London for was to visit Soho (London gay nightspot, freshers)… I had heard a lot about it, and had to see it for myself. It’s definitely an interesting experience waltzing into a strange bar by yourself in a foreign city halfway across the world, not knowing anyone… I had to work up a little bit of Dutch Courage, but less than one Corona later I was chatting to two incredibly gorgeous boys, who happened to be a couple, and their Swedish friend. I hadn’t counted on their 35-year old “bi-curious” friend Russ however…. he apparently put a 10 quid bet on with his mate that he could get me into bed. He definitely was determined not to lose his tenner… my new cute couple friends were about ready to deck him after about an hour. Thankfully he got the hint when they told him to piss off.
One of the best things about the night was going up and introducing myself to complete and utter strangers. By the end of the night, I had introduced myself to cute English lads, Lithuanians, Germans, Swedes and the occasional American, before heading off to the local gay nightclub with a twinky Russian and a few others. I had an amazing time at the nightclub, saw Pete Burns perform, but I have to say I was a little underwhelmed. He really wasn’t that much of a performer. Yeah I get it… he looks like a girl. He wears a dress. Don’t care. The nightclub went off though… lots of cute boys dancing. I had a great time… will definitely remember it
Back to it
I’ll miss the weekend… I met so many great, funny, wierd and different people, a few of which I hope to stay mates with when I return back home. Sunday was literally spent in recovery… a 3 hour bath in the hotel watching “Stargate Atlantis”. Back at work today… what will next weekend bring?
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